Interesting.Arthur Dent wrote:I have nothing useful to add personally, but I thought I'd share an This American Life episode on the topic. Researchers bring married couples into a lab to argue. Through observations of how they go about it, they can generate highly accurate predictions of whether the marriage will last.
http://www.thisamericanlife.org/radio-a ... iage?act=1
Resolving stupid marital conflicts
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Re: Resolving stupid marital conflicts
- JCShutout
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Re: Resolving stupid marital conflicts
Before my wife and I got married, we read and discussed this book together, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work. We really liked it, and it helped us face head on our biggest fears and triggers, because we wanted to get those things figured out before we got married. If you are one who doesn't like counseling or can't afford it, this might be a good exercise.
Also, I really think most of the time, at least for us, if we fight, its because we are both overstressed, and are both trying to lean on each other. (When one is stressed and the other okay, no problem, when both need support, its tough) We constantly remind ourselves that its not about each of us doing 50%, its about us both giving 100%, and sometimes one person's 100% will look like more, and sometimes it will look like less, depending on how much we are dealing with at that moment. Also, sometimes even both of our 100%s isn't enough to get everything done because life is a dick sometimes.
EDIT: lol, the book we read is by the same team in the NPR podcast in the post above mine.
Also, I really think most of the time, at least for us, if we fight, its because we are both overstressed, and are both trying to lean on each other. (When one is stressed and the other okay, no problem, when both need support, its tough) We constantly remind ourselves that its not about each of us doing 50%, its about us both giving 100%, and sometimes one person's 100% will look like more, and sometimes it will look like less, depending on how much we are dealing with at that moment. Also, sometimes even both of our 100%s isn't enough to get everything done because life is a dick sometimes.
EDIT: lol, the book we read is by the same team in the NPR podcast in the post above mine.