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Seriously thrill - when are we getting this back up? We're running out of time in ST.

Is that a 10-pound weight in your pants, or did someone just offer you a dozen Edwin Jackson starts for Colby Rasmus?

Matchup 1
thrill 6-3-1 (thrill) vs Danville Warriors 3-6-1 (Richie Allen)
Magglio Ordonez, who killed my team last year and I couldn't have gotten rid of quick enough, came back to stomp on my [expletive] to the tune of .462, 2 HRs, 6 Runs & 6 RBIs. Also, the FA move of the week was Thrill's pickup of Edgar Renteria, who hit .533. Still, Danville out-homered thrill with 13, led by Nelson Cruz's 4, knocked in 43 runs and hung close with BA until the final day. Danville only won 1 pitching category but it was an impressive 2.63 ERA. Thrill's pitching staff looks very solid with Tim Lincecum (17 Ks/14 IP) and Chris Carpenter leading the way. Thrill got a strong outing from their pen too.

Matchup 2
Stillwater Stallions 7-3 (longhornbaseball) vs The Reamers 3-7 (MrSaigon)
Stillwater looked pretty solid in every category except ERA. Hideki Matsui, who no one ever wants on their team, hit .370 with 2 HRs and 5 RBIs. Matt Holliday, however, was the MVP for Stillwater with his .423 average, 3 HRs, 6 ribbies and 8 runs scored. The Reamers had an off week at the plate but got 6 saves out of their bullpen and won 3 of the 5 pitching categories.

Matchup 3
lazy bums 3-7 (clevername) vs Beaver Shooters 7-3 (planet pujolsian)
The Beaver Shooters were an offensive juggernaut this week with a .300 average, 15 HRs, 45 RBIs and 46 runs scored. Their pitching staff, while recording a piss-poor ERA (thanks to Z), also slapped 8 Ws on the board. Pujols (.375, 4 HRs & 10 RBIs) and Vernon Wells (.350, 4 HR) provided the slugging and they got wins from 8 different pitchers. The lazy bums didn't hit worth a [expletive] but got nice K totals from Gallardo (10/12 IP) and Sabathia (9/13 IP) and an outstanding performance from Matt Garza (9 Ks/8 IP, 4 hits and 1 ER).

Matchup 4
Schenectady Swingers 8-1-1 (Fan_In_NY) vs My Pujols Burns 1-8-1 (Swirls)
The Swingers took advantage of some great pitching and some healthy slugging and even managed to win BA with a .2458 mark (edging out .2457). Nearly everyone on the roster homered and Rickie Weeks (.368) and Ian Stewart (.391) hit for solid averages. Roy Halliday was the pitcher of the week with 17 Ks, 2 wins and a 0.56 ERA. Swirls has already employed 20 offensive players and Dustin Pedroia (.360, 3 HRs, 7 RBIs & 6 runs) was the best of the bunch. MPB also had what appears to be a nice pickup in Shaun Marcum but the more exciting news may have come from Altoona, PA: "Strasburg threw five innings in his minor league debut on Sunday, allowing four runs (just one earned) on four hits with eight strikeouts and two walks. He worked in the 97-98 mph range, according to the Associated Press. He also added an RBI double"

Matchup 5
Mulder's Shoulder 6-3-1 (InvincibleCakeEater) vs Hits 3b, 2b, 1b That Smooth HR 3-6-1 (JackofDiamonds)
ICE threw down a staggering .333 BA in the first week and did, indeed, steal the [expletive] out of some bases (13). JOD put together the highest RBI total of the week (50) to nearly avoid being swept offensively (MS had 49). Miguel Cabrera (.522, 2 HR & 8 RBIs) led the long list of players having hot weeks for CakeEater. Placido Polanco matched Cabrera's 8 RBIs, while hitting .481. JOD got nice K totals from Dan Haren (13/13.2 IP), Josh Johnson (10/10 IP) and Justin Verlander (9/10 IP), although still losing the category to ICE's 55. JOD's highlight of the week was the emergence of Jason Heyward (.292/3 HR/8 RBIs).

Matchup 6
Glengarry Leads 5-4-1 (ghostrunner) vs Contronious Rex 4-5-1 (stldogget05)
The closest matchup of the week. Glengarry got 10 RBIs from Jorge Cantu and 11 from Chris Young to lead the offense. Contronious got solid hitting across the board to end the week with a .302 average. Contronious also seems to have struck gold with Ubaldo Jimenez (who was the last guy I decided not to keep from last year) who might be making that step into the upper echelon of major league pitchers (2-0, 13 Ks/12 IP and a 2.25 ERA). Mark Buehrle put together two solid outings (2-0, 2.40 ERA & .093 WHIP) for Glengarry.


Player of the Week: Albert Pujols .375, 4 HR, 10 RBIs, 7 runs (edges out Nelson Cruz .450, 4 HR, 9 RBIs, 6 runs)
Pitcher of the Week: Roy Halladay 2-0, 17 Ks, 0.56 ERA, 0.94 WHIP (edges out Tim Lincecum 2-0, 17 Ks, 1.29 ERA, 0.71 WHIP)
Relief Pitcher of the Week: Jon Rauch 4 saves
Manager of the Week: Thrill picks up Edgar Renteria who hits .522 and wins him the BA category by less than .010. He also takes 6 out of 10 from Danville, while spending virtually no money in the draft.

Three of them involve jokes. They are a handy comedic prop.

Once I needed to scare away a groundhog, and had nothing else at my disposal.

And once I needed to make some money to pay my rent, so I made a deposit.

Swirls, you're lame for keeping every single starting pitcher on the bench in order to keep your 0.00 ERA and WHIP.

Huh? I had 57.1 innings pitched against you last week, with a stellar 5.18 ERA and 1.25 WHIP.

Three of them involve jokes. They are a handy comedic prop.

Once I needed to scare away a groundhog, and had nothing else at my disposal.

And once I needed to make some money to pay my rent, so I made a deposit.