Corporate Speak

[Hungary Jack]

If I'm salary I have to work until the job's down - if it takes 40 hours or 60 I'm supposed to be at my desk getting it done. And I get paid the same both weeks. But if there's 20 hours of work to do? Costs me a vacation day to not come in Friday.

That's not factual.

Citation?

Well, I did put this

A guy at our company that has been hemorrhaging money was asked how group (of two people) was doing. Yeah, two [expletive] people and they are essentially just collecting paychecks and going home

And, the way you presented it just made it seem like it was common practice/certainty that if a person didn't have work for a day or two, they'd be taking a forced vacation or furlough. Yeah, if a company/municipality/state/etc is way low on work/out of budget, then they'll either lay people off or institute that. But, by and large, salaried employees get away with having a couple days of overhead a month if not more.

Edit to say: I see now we were talking about different things. Yeah, your'e not going to get ot if you're salaried. I thought you were trying to say if you only had 20 hours of work you had to take a vacation day to get your 40 hours which isn't true.

You guys need to get on the same page. Get aligned. Find some synergies.

[Radbird]

A guy on a conf call I was on today referred to something as a "win-win-win-win-win".

[vinsanity]

And, the way you presented it just made it seem like it was common practice/certainty that if a person didn't have work for a day or two, they'd be taking a forced vacation or furlough. Yeah, if a company/municipality/state/etc is way low on work/out of budget, then they'll either lay people off or institute that. But, by and large, salaried employees get away with having a couple days of overhead a month if not more.

Edit to say: I see now we were talking about different things. Yeah, your'e not going to get ot if you're salaried. I thought you were trying to say if you only had 20 hours of work you had to take a vacation day to get your 40 hours which isn't true.

Gotcha. Sorry, not a bit. At my last job when there wasn't work to do it was strongly encouraged, even 'incentivized' to take vacation instead of collecting a check and doing nothing. But it was consulting work and hardly 'forced'. Though, when you're boss says "Would you be willing to do x (because it helps the company, since you aren't making us money)?" Saying no isn't entirely optional.

I was saying, if I'm salary and week 1 I have 60 hours of work to do. Due at 5pm Friday. I get to spend 12 hours of a day working to get it done. But I get the same paycheck as if I had 40 hours of work to do (i.e. I'm overachieving for the same pay as meeting expectations). But if after I hit that deadline, things slow down and there's only legitimately 32 hours of work the next week, if I don't spend those extra 8 hours at my desk I need vacation.

In a simple phrase; As salary you're expected to work, for the same pay, until the job is done. As long as that job takes at least 40 hours. There's no give and take.

That irks me. If you give me what you think is 40 hours of work, and I get it done Wednesday at 8pm? Why make should I come in the next two days? I should be available by phone and likely e-mail. Make appearances for important meetings and the like. But why do I need to sit at my desk for 9 hours and try and look busy? Next week? Give me some more work, what you'd call '50 hours' and see if that fills my time. So it goes.

[G. Keenan]

Price point.

When did price stop being a good enough word to convey the concept of what something costs?

[Hungary Jack]

According to my client, I am delivering lots of value, though they didn't go as far to say "high quality, low cost."

[jim]

A guy on a conf call I was on today referred to something as a "win-win-win-win-win".

I would not have been able to resist something along the lines of a "win-win-win-win-slaughter-rule" comeback.

[wart57]

"Teaching moment" Don't tell me that [expletive], just tell me I [expletive] up and tell me to try not to [expletive] up again. I am not 12.

[Hungary Jack]

"Teaching moment" Don't tell me that [expletive], just tell me I [expletive] up and tell me to try not to [expletive] up again. I am not 12.

It's "teachable moment."

Case in point.

Get on board, Wart. We need your A game.

[Freed Roger]

Can anyone tell me what a "thought-leadership program" is? I read it today in an internal memo, and need a translation.

Translation -

This brainwashing image sums up the Lean Six Sigma and Black Belt programs perfectly.
And every time a "huddle' is called for at work, I do whatever I can to avoid.

My wife mentioned people becoming Black Belts in Six Sigma in the corporate world. I thought someone may have fooled Mrs. Freed, like a corporate version of cowtipping etc. So I googled it. Then I did a GRB search to confirm.
http://www.sixsigmaonline.org/index.html

[Freed Roger]

Corporate speak fail:
Four Pillars.