Rant: Where's Cronos' hookup thread?

[st.lewis11]

This thread is so awesome, I hope this eventually makes the archives.

[Arthur Dent]

So, the secret is that it was so bad that ....?

Misidentified secretions led to some kind of mix up?

[planet planet]

So, the secret is that it was so bad that ....?

Misidentified secretions led to some kind of mix up?

You got it. Jocephus' boy secretions cannibalized his lady friend's girl secretions. Kind of like mixing blood type A with type B.

[Arthur Dent]

Failed to watch out for



?

[Maclowery]

Dear Cronos: I would like you do dedicate your third thrust to me, if you can. Don't say it out loud, though, just think it.

If you are unsure of whether you'll be able to remember this mid-coitus, you can always pre-dedicate it, but in that case it does have to be vocalized to the awaiting lady.

[lukethedrifter]

I used to work with this creepy old man that would tell me to pat my girlfriend on the [expletive] for him regularly. Yeeccchhh.

[G. Keenan]

I used to work with this creepy old man that would tell me to pat my girlfriend on the [expletive] for him regularly. Yeeccchhh.

Awesome.

[Radbird]

Theme song for Mr. Cronos.

[/youtube]
I want a girl with a mind like a diamond
I want a girl who knows what's best
I want a girl with shoes that cut
And eyes that burn like cigarettes

I want a girl with the right allocations
Who's fast and thorough
And sharp as a tack
She's playing with her jewelry
She's putting up her hair
She's touring the facility
And picking up slack

I want a girl with a short skirt and a lonnnng jacket......

I want a girl who gets up early
I want a girl who stays up late
I want a girl with uninterrupted prosperity
Who used a machette to cut through red tape
With fingernails that shine like justice
And a voice that is dark like tinted glass

She is fast and thorough
And sharp as a tack
She's touring the facility
And picking up slack

I want a girl with a short skirt and a lonnnnng.... lonnng jacket

I want a girl with a smooth liquidation
I want a girl with good dividends
And at the city bank we will meet accidentally
We'll start to talk when she borrows my pen

She wants a car with a cupholder arm rest
She wants a car that will get her there
She's changing her name from Kitty to Karen
She's trading her MG for a white Chrysler La Baron

I want a girl with a short skirt and a lonnnnggggggggg jacket

[TGantz]

i would go as far as to say that everytime with someone new isn't always good...takes a while to know their turnons, body movements, smells...secretions

I will now think of this post when I'm trying my hardest to not blow my load instead of baseball, cold showers, and Margaret Thatcher on a cold night.

Seriously, you need to know their smells? I hope that doesn't involve butt hole pleasures. Secretion is the second grossest word associated with sex, following close behind "ooze".

[cpebbles]

Great, now you guys have me thinking of the story my friend told me once which turned me off the idea of backdoor action for life...