Oh no, they're not there. I begin to look in the usual places...coffee table, couch, kitchen counter. Nothing. I think back to the day my cat knocked them off of the shelf and they landed on a baseball glove the next shelf down. Don't know what made me look there, but there they were. Not today. I begin to scramble. I think back to last night and bet that my wife has them. I'll bet she does. But I still look and think of alternatives. My truck, yes my truck. I go out and realize that it is running on E and I don't believe I have the key to the fuel tank anyway. OK, I'll see if I can make it to where my wife works. You see, she leaves about five minutes before me. I make it across town in the dark with the lights on bright, because they don't work at all on dim (tried to fix). The place that she works is locked at all doors and the workers are in cubicles, so I can't see anyone. I hoped to maybe catch a straggler and tell them my situation. Nothing. Here I realize that I do have a fuel key, so I could get gas. But my truck has an unusual problem. If you shut it off after it has warmed up, it will not start again until it cools (have no idea why). So that's out. I return home and look for the keys some more. I look up my wife's work number on the intrawebs. I call it. Disconnected. I look some more. I try to find a different number. I call it. Yeah. I enter her last name. Yeah. Voice mail. Noooo! I tried more times. Voice mail. At this point I realize I'm in trouble. We also have a '1973 Dodge motorhome.
I start thinking I'll take that, but it is pretty unreliable, and I have my doubts if it would get me 20 miles. But I could be like Trapper John, M.D. I start looking for my keys again, and whoa, there appears to be a spare on a ring. I had no idea we had a spare! I have to bust the garage door, but that's ok. Yes, the key works! I go to work one hour late, and have to explain myself, but the boys were cool about it. So at lunch I call the wife. I ask, 'Do you have my keys'. She replies, 'Oh [expletive]'. She did have them. I know exactly how this happened. She drove home last night but was using my keys. I was messing in the glove box and took her keys out and she asked me to set them on the console so she wouldn't forget them. She didn't, but slipped my keys in her purse before grabbing hers. She then left for work. She pulled her keys out in the dark and never noticed mine.
Dammit.
