Corporate Speak

[jim]

My new boss was a business consultant for years and he is so off the charts it's not even funny. He never says "I agree" or "Yep", he says "I concur". He also says "Will you join Bob and I?" because he's a phony dick. Yesterday he wanted me to go through a power point presentation and all he could do was talk about my lack of using a "snazzy" template. Yeah, no [expletive], I picked the first one because it was ... well first, and it happens to be white and black. Also something about slide numbers.

I concur. What an [expletive].

[greenback44]

Your boss uses "I" as a direct object? Time to update your resume.

[docellis]

I've had friends who told me to stop using big words. that confused me. i don't use big words. i said something like sporadic, and one friend stopped me and said, see there?

[jim]

I respect and admire a well rounded vocabulary. I've always imagined sighyoung to have such a vocabulary that I admire, expressing himself in an elegant yet unpretentious way. Where I have a problem is when it's forced. Who in the hell ever says "I concur"? That is not normal speech. And then they follow it up with "Could you join Bob and *I* for sushi after work" and oh by the way you need a pretty font and blue outlined in gold and pink ponies sprinkled with angel [expletive] hair on your presentation.

[ghostrunner]

I've had friends who told me to stop using big words. that confused me. i don't use big words. i said something like sporadic, and one friend stopped me and said, see there?

Hey guys, doc has the fancy book learnin'.

[IMADreamer]

The owner of my old business had me in for a big team meeting today and talked about "synergy." WTF is synergy? If it means getting our ass kicked by competition, we are pretty good at it.

[JackofDiamonds]

I've had friends who told me to stop using big words. that confused me. i don't use big words. i said something like sporadic, and one friend stopped me and said, see there?

Hey guys, doc has the fancy book learnin'.

Burn her! She's a witch!

[Molly]

I've had friends who told me to stop using big words. that confused me. i don't use big words. i said something like sporadic, and one friend stopped me and said, see there?

Hey guys, doc has the fancy book learnin'.

Burn her! She's a witch!

Did she turn you into a newt?

[JackofDiamonds]

I got better.

[Molly]

I got better.

I was expecting no other answer!