Cobra Kai, post season two, should be taught in colleges. Everyone can learn a lesson from it. Granted that lesson is what is absolute [expletive] TV.
Sandman isn't renewed. We lost a season of BoJack for this garbage.
It is tonally, objectively, story-wise, acting-wise, some of the worst things ever put to film. Like
The Room was trying to be dramatic and failed and actors try and fail in such comically bad ways it's funny.
Not this. It doesn't know what it is. Please. For the love of a God I can't believe after seeing this absolute abomination, I suffered so you didn't have to. Do not watch it. Do not like it. Tweet at Macchio and Netflix to get the [expletive] out of the way.
Positive notes; the fight choreography (in all five scenes of 10 episodes) is good but awfully shot and horrible editing. Could be because the young actors seem to be doing a lot of the stunts and absolute credit to them for that. The younger actors are good. Zapka is good. The stunt work from the young actors is good, there's obvious speed ups and rapid cuts.
For real, I hate YA stuff but it would work if they kept it that way. But what 18 year old (looking up to a 24 year old playing a 17 year old?) gives a [expletive] about William Zapka's ultrasound inspiring him? It's so stupid contrived and wrapped up in the exact same drama instead of getting interesting. For instance; take Ozymandias from Breaking bad. That entire episode's plot can be summed up quick without total explanation.
- [SHOW]
- Nazis selling a drug maker's drugs, kills drug maker's brother-in-law and partner. Kidnap his partner. Steal his money. Drug maker is revealed as such to his family.
I get there are secondary implications; I get there's context and depth to what happens but that's what happen in the episode. I can probably sum up the original Karate Kid movie in about as many words to a reasonable degree - again, it doesn't explain everything but it'd be enough you could feel like you saw the movie just from pop-culture references. This show is so much the opposite. It's like, we need 307 characters, with 9800 plotlines. We're going to telegraph every twist. Then drop twists that don't really make sense. We're going to turn 4 90 minute 80's movies in to 5 10 episode seasons of callbacks and references and remember?
Every twist and fakeout is sooooo cliche and telegraphed it's not even funny. Zapka and his scenes work because he doesn't take himself seriously and it actually works.
Honestly, I'm more offended by this than the Falcons blowing a 28-3 lead in the super bowl. This collapse is worse than the 2011 Atlanta Braves. Rick Ankiel didn't implode this bad.
If I could move to Cleveland and buy season tickets to the Indians and prevent another season of this absolute assault on humanity, well Ralph Macchio has to cover that cost because he owes me money for still having a [expletive] career.
They say the opposite of love isn't hate, it's apathy so I suppose this dumpster fire and waste of server space made me feel something. I....
[Not-actually-mod-mod-note] If you like it, I'm sorry. I'm not insulting you or your tastes. I hate onions and love goat cheese. I'm sure some of you have long explanations of why those options are entirely wrong. I'm working hard to not yuck someone's yum. But there are so many objectively wrong things with it that could be changed to make me apathetic it can't go unsaid and the fact Netflix is cancelling Bojack and good [expletive] to greenlight this Macchio vanity project makes me ill.
I feel like I need to watch The Room and Plan 9 From Outer Space and Ed Wood just to remember there's good film out there. Shawshank or Citizen Kane would give me so much whiplash, I'd hit Albert's next three home runs.
[expletive]
I'm getting a new title after this, aren't I.