September 20: Instead of facing Albert Pujols with the bases loaded in the bottom of the ninth inning, Astros closer Brad Lidge just turns around and throws the ball over the left field fence.
DJ Gallo is my favorite writer for page 2(one of the only ones I can stand, really). I can't read a single article he writes without laughing out loud.
August 23: Delmon Young plays an instrumental role in allowing Tampa Bay teammate Carl Crawford to steal home to beat the A's by taking a pitch, then giving Crawford cover by beating Oakland catcher Jason Kendall with his bat.
Last edited by brats&beer on April 4 07, 11:31 am, edited 1 time in total.
April 9: Realizing he has much more free time during a game now that he is a full-time DH, Mike Piazza has a small salon installed into Oakland's dugout so he can get his tips frosted during games.
April 16: Former Cubs ace Mark Prior earns his way out of Triple-A Iowa by blowing out his shoulder.
April 18: After calling a game-ending third strike on Delmon Young of the Devil Rays, umpire Joe West tazers Young in the chest in a pre-emptive strike.
May 5: White Sox catcher Wiki Gonzalez denies reports that he is a mass, user-created Latino baseball player.
May 30: With the Arizona Diamondbacks in town, Phillies fans chuck batteries at Arizona shortstop Stephen Drew with notes attached saying: "These are for your brother, J.D. Please throw them at him for us."
June 1: St. Louis Cardinals slugger Albert Pujols opens a package from his mother in the clubhouse, pulling out a birthday card and a T-shirt that says: "Lordy, Lordy, Look Who's 40," but quickly buries the T-shirt in his locker before anyone can see it.
June 22: Tony La Russa passes out during the eighth inning of a tight game against the Phillies, thereby allowing his left-handed reliever to stay in the game and pitch to two right-handed batters. Upon learning what he allowed to happen upon waking up, La Russa vows to never drink again.
July 18: David Ortiz comes through in the clutch again by pushing Manny Ramirez away a moment before Ramirez tries to lick the clubhouse stove.
August 6: Houston's Craig Biggio strokes a bloop single into short left field at home against the Cubs to record the 3,000th hit of his career. The Astros later construct a huge statue of Biggio where the ball landed, between the shortstop and the left fielder, to honor the moment and to give Minute Maid Park a much-needed infusion of character.
August 22: With Derek Jeter stuck in a 12-for-100 slump, Yankees manager Joe Torre urges him to start showing more tangibles.
August 23: Delmon Young plays an instrumental role in allowing Tampa Bay teammate Carl Crawford to steal home to beat the A's by taking a pitch, then giving Crawford cover by beating Oakland catcher Jason Kendall with his bat.
September 14: Sammy Sosa begins pretending that he doesn't speak English again, raising suspicions that it will soon be made public that he failed a steroids test.
September 20: Instead of facing Albert Pujols with the bases loaded in the bottom of the ninth inning, Astros closer Brad Lidge just turns around and throws the ball over the left field fence.
September 28: Barry Bonds tells reporters he wants to play at least two more years, or until he can tarnish every major record in baseball.
September 15: Red Sox outfielder Manny Ramirez decides he wants to start his own blog like Curt Schilling, but gives up after yelling into his computer's disk drive fails to put any of his words onto the Internet
May 4: Astros closer Brad Lidge finally figures out a way to prevent Albert Pujols from beating him by giving up a walkoff home run to the Cardinals batter hitting directly in front of Pujols.
May 4: Astros closer Brad Lidge finally figures out a way to prevent Albert Pujols from beating him by giving up a walkoff home run to the Cardinals batter hitting directly in front of Pujols.
i laughed hysterically at this one, given all of the controversy lately...
April 8: Bud Selig voids baseball's $700 million deal with DirecTV as the exclusive provider of the Extra Innings package and sells it to the Broadcasting Corporation of China for $700.0005 million, reasoning the extra 500 bucks is worth out-of-market games being completely unavailable to American fans.
